Monday, January 21, 2008

Wall Street Dating

The following message exchange took place on Craigslist, the New York Community Message Board:

What am I doing wrong ? I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25-year-old girl. I’m articulate and classy. I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in NewYork City, so I don’t think I’m over-reaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board ? Any wifes ? Could you send me some tips ? I dated a business man who made around 200 - 200K. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. $250.000 won’t get me to Central Park West. I Know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker, and lives in Tribeca. She’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right ?

Here are my questions specifically:
Where do you single rich men hang out ? Give me specifics - bars, Restaurants, gyms …
What are you looking for in a mate ?
Is there an age range I should be targeting ?
Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the Upper East Side so plain. What’s the story there ?
Lawyers, investment bankers, doctors. How much do those guys really make ? And where do the hedge fund guys hang out ?
How do you rich guys decide on marriage versus just a girlfried ? I am looking for Marriage only.

An Investment Banker’s Response: I qualify as a guy who fits your bill - I make more than $500K per year. Here’s how I see it: Your offer is a plain and simple crappy business deal. What you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money.

Fine, simple. But there’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity - in fact, it is very likely that my income will increase, but it is an absolutely certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful ! So, in economic terms, you are a depreciating asset. In Wall Street Terms, we’d call you a trading position - not a buy and hold. It doesn’t make good business sense to ‘buy you’ (which is what you’re asking) - so I’d rather lease. The deal that makes sense to me is dating, not marriage.

4 comments:

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