Tiger's got a new girlfriend and her name is Alyse Lahti Johnston...meanwhile Elin Nordegren shells out 12 million for a house next to Tiger's

Tiger Woods has jumped back into the dating pool and is seeing a 22-year-old student who looks just like his ex-wife Elin Nordegren. Not nearly as hot after she got busted for DUI last year. (picture below) No naked photos of Alyse Lahti yet, like the ones that were posted of Elin Nordegren.

To ease the pain Elin shelled out 12 million of Tiger's money for a new 17,000 square foot pad in Jupiter, Florida.

Tiger's 'transgressions' from left to right, top row: Jaimee Grubbs, Holly Sampson, Jamie Jungers, Mindy Lawton. Bottom row: Cori Rist, Kalika Moquin, Rachel Uchitel, and Joslyn James.

Mistress Kelly Baker testifies for Michelle Schrenker (video)

UPDATE!!!

IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE TODAY SHOW VIDEO OF MICHELLE SCHRENKER GO HERE

This one is getting good!
With her husband in jail, Michelle Schrenker entered court to stop the state's attempt to permanently freeze her assets. Refusing to answer questions and covering her face, the wife of the Fishers investment manager who parachuted out of his plane, letting it crash in Florida, had an unlikely ally in court: her husband's self-proclaimed girlfriend, Kelly Baker.

Baker testified on Michelle Schrenker's behalf that Marcus Schrenker spent investors' money lavishly on her. But attorneys for the secretary of state's securities commission paint another picture of Michelle Schrenker - the chief financial officer of her husband's investment companies who knowingly spent tens of thousands of dollars from defrauded investors.

The 4 million dollar home, along with several Lexuses, were in Michelle Schrenker's name, though it is unclear what was purchased with investor funds. Michelle Schrenker also got a biweekly salary of $5,800 from the company, but now claims her function was in name only.

Schrenker's wife was not the only person on the receiving end of his financial gain. His girlfriend, Kelly Baker, testified on Michelle Schrenker's behalf. Baker said Schrenker bought her presents and deposited about $20,000 into her account from September to December.

Schrenker and Baker became friends in October 2007. Baker, a former employee at Indy Aero, where Schrenker kept his airplane, said the relationship turned romantic in January 2008 and continued until early last month.

While they were dating, Baker said, Schrenker gave her a 2007 Ford Edge valued at $30,000, along with two Louis Vuitton bags and a Louis Vuitton watch and coin purse. He also rented a condo in Fishers for the two to share in June 2008 -- depositing a year's lease of about $30,000-- and gave Baker $70,000 to furnish it.

Marcus Schrenker and his mistress

Just when you thought this guy couldn't be a bigger tool, the NY Post comes up with some video of Marcus and his new squeeze...dumping the wife and kids to jet off to Key West for some New Year's Eve nookie.

Meet Kelly Baker, the latest to gain 15 minutes of fame, as America's latest tramp of the week.

Now take another look at the picture below, and it just proves one of lifes little lessons. "No matter how good lookin they are....somebody, somewhere, is tired of puttin up with their shit."

Now we find out that when rescuers reached his crashed aircraft, they found "evidence (a cheat sheet) including a book of campsites in America missing its pages on Alabama and Florida, and a bullet-point list scribbled on the back of a book that read: 'cracked windshield, window imploded, bleeding profusely'." How did this guy ever fool anybody?

Go here for the hilairious details on "Bailing out of an airplane for dummies"

Michelle Schrenker naked

UPDATE!! IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE TODAY SHOW VIDEO OF MICHELLE SCHRENKER....GO HERE
You didn't really believe that did you? The real headline was supposed to be "A man with his three favorite possessions."

But on my first day back, i'm trying to generate some hits, so you have to settle for a picture of Michelle Schrenker and her douchbag, soon to be ex-husband, Marcus.
Turns out this was no ordinary Piper Malibu, this was a 2002 Meridian, a very expensive turbine version of the Malibu, estimated value $1 million. Pictured in the background of the photo is the airplane in question, along with Mr. Schrenker, his Lexus, and his wife Michelle Schrenker.

This lovely looking woman who is grabbing this guy's junk, while carefully exposing that large rock and contemplating smashing someones head in with a tropical fruit, possibly a guava, is Michelle Schrenker . This 36 year old is what we call a trophy wife, and a mother of three. And she’s pretty hot despite her having one leg more tanned than the other one. As you can see, I have not analyzed this picture much.

Now there’s not a reason in the world for me to post this, but I understand from Google Trends that Michelle Schrenker name is the highest rated search currently on the go tonight. So what I’m doing is a little hit-baiting, seeing as if I will get zillions of hits by just posting a few pictures of Michelle Schrenker while constantly typing her name. Her name being Michelle Schrenker.

UPDATE

Just when you thought this guy couldn't be a bigger tool, the NY Post comes up with some video of Marcus and his new squeeze...dumping the wife and kids to jet off to Key West for some New Year's Eve nookie. Meet Kelly Baker, the latest to gain 15 minutes of fame, as America's latest