The Marcus Schrenker fairytail airplane ride

So remember our favorite flyboy wannabe Bernie Madoff...... Marcus Schrenker? You know..... financial fraud, jumped out of his plane with a parachute, tried to commit suicide in a tent with a map of campgrounds and notes on what his distress call should say? Turns out, he isn't detail oriented enough to pull off something like that.

He was on Good Morning America telling his tale of woe, and it's actually a hilarious read, but you'd have to be an Obama voter to actually believe any of this bullshit.

I can't believe Michelle Schrenker hasn't struck a deal for some naked pictures with Playboy or some other rag, before her 15 minutes are up. I don't think their is going to much to buy groceries with after Marcus goes off to meet Bubba in the prison showers.

Marcus Schrenker and his mistress

Just when you thought this guy couldn't be a bigger tool, the NY Post comes up with some video of Marcus and his new squeeze...dumping the wife and kids to jet off to Key West for some New Year's Eve nookie.

Meet Kelly Baker, the latest to gain 15 minutes of fame, as America's latest tramp of the week.

Now take another look at the picture below, and it just proves one of lifes little lessons. "No matter how good lookin they are....somebody, somewhere, is tired of puttin up with their shit."

Now we find out that when rescuers reached his crashed aircraft, they found "evidence (a cheat sheet) including a book of campsites in America missing its pages on Alabama and Florida, and a bullet-point list scribbled on the back of a book that read: 'cracked windshield, window imploded, bleeding profusely'." How did this guy ever fool anybody?

Go here for the hilairious details on "Bailing out of an airplane for dummies"

Markus Schenker was not the pilot here

A US Airways plane with 55 people on board went into the chilly Hudson River, apparently after striking some geese upon takeoff from New York's LaGuardia Airport. Everybody made it out.
If these were Canadian geese, is this a terrorist act?

The stock market should go up today...what a country! Seriously this pilot must have a huge set of balls. He deserves whatever he wants, because it won't be long before PETA uses his likeness in a campaign for saving the geese.

And I hate to dampen the euphoria, but this America, and the plane was loaded with business people and other assorted asshats, who appear to exiting WITH THEIR CARRY-ONS! C,mon people... survival first, bag of make-up and your free peanuts next.