you mean he didn't pull the covers over her head?

Senator Hillary Clinton and former Attorney General Janet Reno were having one of those girl-to-girl talks, and Hillary said to Janet, You're lucky that you don't have to put up with men seeking sex with you.
I have to put up with Bill, and there is no telling where he's been last.' Janet responded, 'Just because I am aesthetically challenged (that's politically correct' for ugly as a mud fence) does not mean I don't have to fight off occasional unwelcome advances.' Hillary asks, 'Well, how do you deal with the problem?'

Janet: 'Whenever I feel that a guy is getting ready to make a pass at me, I muster all my might, tense, and squeeze to break wind as loud and hard as I can.'
That night, Bill was already in bed with the lights out when Hillary slips into bed. She could hear him start to stir, and knew that he would want some action. She had been saving gas all day long and was ready for him. She tenses up and forces out the most disgusting sound you could imagine. Bill rolled over and said, 'Janet, is that you?

Restaurant Customer Returns 18,000 pound Bottle Of Wine After Claiming It Was Fake

A customer dining at the swanky Michelin-starred Zafferano in Knightsbridge, London sent back an 18,000 pound bottle of Petrus 1961, regarded as one of the finest wines ever made, after he claimed it was a fake.
Upon opening the wine the customer refused to touch it because the cork was not stamped with the standard mark of provenance proving where and when it was made.

The customer, still intent on spending a small fortune on a bottle, ordered a magnum of Mouton Rothschild 1945 at 20,000 pounds. STORY

Shifting morality

Don't get me wrong, I like lawyers. Some of my best friends are lawyers.
Ok that's a lie but I do know a few.

A young farm lad from Iowa goes off to college, but about 1/3 of the way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered away all of the money his parents gave him. Then he gets an idea. He calls his daddy. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education is coming up with!
Why, they actually have a program here at Iowa State that will teach our dog Old Blue how to talk!" That's absolutely amazing," his father says. "How do I get him in that program?" Just send him down here with $1,000" the boy says. "I'll get him into the course." So, his father sends the dog and the $1,000. About 2/3 way through the semester, the money runs out.
The boy calls his father again. So how's Old Blue doing, son?" his father asks. Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won' t believe this - they've had such good results with this program that they've implemented a new one to teach the animals how to READ!" "READ?" says his father. "No kidding! What do I have to do to get him in that program?" "Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class." His father sends the money.
The boy now has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out that the dog can neither talk, nor read. So he shoots the dog. When he gets home at the end of the semester, his father is all excited. "Where's Old Blue? I just can't wait to see him talk and read something!" "Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Old Blue was in the living room kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he usually does.
Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing around with that little redhead who lives in town?' " The father says, "I hope you shot that son of a bitch before he talks to your mother!" "I sure did, Dad!" "That's my boy!" The kid went on to become a lawyer.

How it will feel if Hillary is elected President

Got an Economic problem?...blame the US

The volume of sales in the Belgian retail sector in December of last year fell by 7% in comparison with a year ago.
The fall is the largest in a decade and a half. Higher food and energy prices are blamed for Belgians' reluctance to dip into their wallet.

Belgians also say they are worried about a recession in the US. Luc Aben of the bankers' Van Lanschot says there is a real problem with spending power, but there are also psychological factors, Belgians are influenced by the talk of economic gloom in the media.

The Economists have started to mimick the global warming modus operandi.

If you have any kind of bad weather, blame it on global warming. If you have an economic problem, blame it on the United States.

Last week poor figures were posted for the January sales. Retail sales fell across the European Union last year, but the reduction is largest in Belgium. Spending by the public at large has a big impact on the economy as a whole. The tumbling figures suggest that the European economic slow down is worse than anticipated.