Mothers Day

Like His Mother Used to Do

He didn’t like the casserole
And he didn’t like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard…
Not like his mother used to make.

I didn’t make the coffee right
He didn’t like the stew,
I didn’t mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.

I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I smacked him upside his head –
Like his mother used to do.

Happy Mothers Day...by the way, I ordered some hookers

For all you mother’s out there who are disappointed that your little guy didn’t get you flowers for Mother’s Day…just be happy you didn’t give birth to Ralph Hardy.

Ralph Hardy, a 13-year-old from Newark, Texas confessed to ordering an extra credit card from his father’s existing credit card company, and took his friends on a $30,000 spending spree, culminating in playing “Halo” on an Xbox with a couple of hookers in a Texas motel. STORY

I really wish I was a fly on the wall at this “party.” I can hear it now, little high-pitched voices saying stuff like, “Yo yo yo, I gots da Fritoz, beyoootch!” and “What up ladies! Why don’t you sit down and watch me Master Chief the shit out of this bitch.”
I can’t wait to see what Little Ralph has in store for Father’s Day. I’m guessing someone dies! Happy Mother’s Day!