Saturday, October 31, 2009
The Laws of the Internet
1. As an internet discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches certainty.
2. Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of fundamentalism that someone won’t mistake for the real thing.
3. “If it exists, there is porn of it.
4. Any post correcting an error in another post will contain at least one error itself” or “the likelihood of an error in a post is directly proportional to the embarrassment it will cause the poster.
5. “In any discussion involving science or medicine, citing Whale.to as a credible source loses the argument immediately, and gets you laughed out of the room.
6. “If you have to insist that you’ve won an internet argument, you’ve probably lost badly.
7. A person’s mind can be changed by reading information on the internet. The nature of this change will be from having no opinion to having a wrong opinion. 8. Anyone who posts an argument on the internet which is largely quotations can be very safely ignored, and is deemed to have lost the argument before it has begun.
9. Whoever resorts to the argument that ‘whoever resorts to the argument that… …has automatically lost the debate’ has automatically lost the debate
10. The more exclamation points used in an email (or other posting), the more likely it is a complete lie. This is also true for excessive capital letters.