Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling by his clinically depressed poodle

I thought this had to be a joke.........No way in hell would I ever admit this.
Mauled? By a poodle? A depressed poodle? and then again I guess if I were French I would be depressed too.

Former French President Jacques Chirac was rushed to a hospital after being mauled by his pet dog who is prone to violent attacks and being treated for depression. The dramatic incident rattled the ex-president's wife. HELLO!!!!! ........violent attacks?....being treated for depression?....time for a dirt nap you moron!

That’s the problem Frenchmen have when they get old ... they get too slow to wave the surrender flag quickly enough to avoid getting hurt. Besides, if you want to know if your dog is depressed......just wait to see if he's too apathetic to lick his balls.

The French Army is falling apart

According to documents leaked to the French press, half of France's military equipment is busted and inoperable, and most of the rest is held together with duct tape. Less than half of its Puma helicopters, 37 per cent of its Lynx choppers and 33 per cent of its Super Frelon models – built 40 years ago – are in a fit state to fly, according to documents seen by Le Parisien newspaper.

Two thirds of France's Mirage F1 reconnaissance jets are unusable at present.

And yes morons....I know the video is Canadian....but its funny, so its being used to illustrate my point.