Monday, November 30, 2009

I hate when that happens....



That might be broken!

Nothing starts my Monday like watching a French soccer goalie break his leg in the most gruesome Joe Theisman like manner possible.

Go to the 50 second mark to see Joe the Mouth go down.


When people know only government solutions to problems, we tend to get...government solutions to our problems.


But remember-we were all told how "brilliant" Obama was, and how his unparalleled judgment would lead us to peace and prosperity.

The lack of private sector experience in his cabinet - the biggest dearth in history - is indicative of Obama's attitude toward free enterprise.

READ MORE AT AMERICAN THINKER

Twilight Spoof with Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn

CRU Climate Emails Fun


Sunday, November 29, 2009

Go Mikey, Go!!!

Dallas Stars center Mike Modano's pop princess/Dancing with the Stars contestant wife, Willa Ford, has a video out.

Don't be fazed when people tell you that they've boxed the clown to naked pictures of your wife (NSFW - duh). But Mikey should be used to it. Part of being a rich famous athlete is getting to date, or marry the kind of chicks who can make careers out of being masturbation fodder. It comes with territory.

THE WIRE - 100 Greatest Quotes

Now this is an NFL hit!!!!



Watch the devastating blow at about 25 seconds.

American Thanksgiving.....hell ya!


Hide The Decline - Climategate...Minnesotans for global warming.



The Minnesotans for Global Warming boys are at it again.

Can you find the turkey?


Now these are cool Christmas lights!


Rachel Uchitel Pictures.....Tigers little floozy

Before his car accident, Tiger Woods argued with his wife about reports by the National Enquirer that he had an affair with notorious floozy, Rachel Uchitel. Evidently Tiger took a Mulligan on his wedding vows to Swedish beauty Elin Nordegren.
If your husband is in a car accident wouldn’t your first reaction be to open a door?.... Not smash the back window open for no reason unless the car was on fire or something.
Elin is a crazy crazy bitch.
She must be awesome in the sack.

The National Enquirer reports that Racheal Uchitel, a 34-year old "New York party girl", has been the subject of Tiger's dalliances......and by the looks of these pictures i'd say party girl is the right adjective.

But if you're worth say, $500 million or so, you should be allowed to have a few 'wives'.



No double standard here........


The Twilight mom Cougers are out

Monday, November 23, 2009

Obama gets schooled from the Chinese



CNN just spit their coffee out at their monitors watching this. You better believe they are already writing a "CNN FACT CHECK" about this particular skit.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Iraqi detainees taunt Wisconsin Soldiers about Favre

About the only thing worse you could say to a Packers fan is......Your cow doesn't produce enough milk to make cheese.

If you happen to be a Packers fan who is sick and tired of hearing about Brett Favre, and you're thinking of joining the National Guard and going overseas to get away from it all.... stop. It's not going to work. The detainees in Baghdad are going to be just as vicious as the Vikings fans you know.

Iraqi detainees are attempting to hit Wisconsin soldiers where it hurts—with Brett Favre jokes. After troops revealed themselves to be Packers fans by decorating their Wisconsin National Guard camp in Baghdad with the team’s colors, the detainees there apparently realized that Favre’s move from the Packers to the Vikings was a sore point, and “things just started going downhill from there,”

First Lieutenant Tim Boehnen says. "One of the big words they know now is 'shenanigan.' They'll constantly talk about 'Favre shenanigans,'” said Boehnen. “'He's so good for the Vikings,' and 'The Packers have got to really feel bad about that one.’”

The detainees themselves are more focused on soccer, but appear to be quick studies of America’s signature sport. “They’ll hear guards talking about it, and then they pick up a lot of stuff from that,” said Boehnen. “They’re very crafty.”

Detainees are reportedly also bringing up Ryan Grant's diminishing YPC average, showing soldiers the Aaron Rodgers Sack Tracker, and teasing them about drafting Greg Jennings when Brandon Marshall was still on the board.

If you're a movie nerd....this is better than watching a flick.



AFI's 100 Years, 100 Movie Quotes

A Hamster in Amsterdam

Fans fight over a hockey stick at Ducks game



I went to a fight.....and a hockey game broke out?

Goal scoring.......FAIL!!

I'll have a BLT.....without the lettuce and tomato please


North Dakota sucks....but they do have a cool logo.

The most prominent defenders of the University of North Dakota's right to call its teams the Fighting Sioux are neither alumni nor hockey fans. They're Sioux!

The North Dakota Attorney General tells Indian supporters of Sioux nickname to shut up and be offended. Attorney General Wayne Stenehjem has filed a motion to dismiss a lawsuit filed by Spirit Lake Sioux tribal members who want the University of North Dakota to keep its Fighting Sioux nickname.

Just so you're clear, the people who are insisting that the “Fighting Sioux” nickname is “hostile and abusive” are now locked in a legal battle with actual Sioux Indians who want to keep the nickname in place.

This legal bullshit comes after another Sioux tribe in North Dakota voted overwhelmingly in favor of the nickname just makes it all the more absurd.
By the way, in the aftermath of that election nickname opponents said they lost because they hadn’t had enough time to go out to the reservation and educate the voters.
Meaning they didn’t have enough time to go tell the actual Sioux Indians that they’re supposed to be offended by the logo and nickname. Must be the same people who are trying to 'sell' Obama's healthcare bill?

The Sioux Tribe has no problem with it, why do a bunch of liberal white people have a problem?.......oh ya.....

This guy just bows to everybody


"The problem with socialism is eventually you run out of other peoples money"


San Francisco booksellers would rather lose money than go 'Rogue'
Read the whole thing at American Thinker and read the comments if you want to know how an idiot like Pelosi can keep getting reelected. No small wonder California is bankrupt.

Despite San Francisco Bay Area bookseller claims that Sarah Palin's new book "Going Rogue" is "not for thinking people", the Amazon numbers say otherwise.

On a mission to show that Palin's book is selling much worse than, say, the idea of reading Osama Bin Laden his Miranda rights, the San Francisco Chronicle interviewed several local booksellers to find out how well sales of "Going Rogue" were not going:
"Our customers are thinking people," said Nathan Embretson, a bookseller at Pendragon Books in Oakland. "They're not into reading drivel."
"Anything like that we wouldn't carry," said clerk Emily Stackhouse at Cover to Cover Books in San Francisco. "We're a small store and it would probably gross us all out. Some things you carry because of freedom of speech, but a book like that is just gross."

Apparently the job of a "bookseller" in and around San Francisco is not so much to sell product, but rather to give comfort to like-minded individuals and convert the remaining unwashed masses to lockstep ideology. Politics trumps profit, even though profit generates the much needed tax revenue, job growth, and consumer spending this state dearly needs.

Gun Porn.....skeet shooting with a tank

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Al Gore now tells us the earth's core is several million degrees.

Al Gore was out pimping his new book on Conan the other night, when the subject of Geothermal Energy came up. After Conan said drilling holes to the center of the earth sounded a little Lex Luther like..... Al said that the earth's core is "several million degrees".

Only the Nobel Committee could be surprised that The Goracle barely managed to pass his science classes......he got a D at Harvard.

How can a Nobel Prize winner who has contributed to so much concern about global warming go on national TV without a hint of preparation? Because the Goracle uses what all liberals use in the place of careful, conservative thought.......... arrogance.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Sammy Sosa is the new Micheal Jackson

I've heard that TV Land is doing a Munsters remake. Sosa is the leading candidate for Eddie Munster.

Since retired baseball player Sammy Sosa revealed his new complexion and then attributed it to a cream, debate has not stopped.

Video here: Former basketball forward and colorful sports commentator Charles Barkley added his voice to the discussion during a TNT doubleheader on Thursday night.After showing a quick picture of Tina Fey and Sarah Palin, the cast cut to the split image we've all come to know..... Sosa before and after his skin-color change.

Things got funnier, as Barkley and cast tried to visualize what it would look like if both colleague Kenny Smith and Barkley were to turn white. Once the altered images disappeared, Smith rambunctiously yells, "Say it loud, Chuck... I'm black and I'm proud."

Barkley is then shown with a makeup artist applying white makeup to his face while he asks, "If I become white, am I allowed to eat chicken, hamhocks and neck bones?" As Smith guffaws Barkley continues: "Seriously, I love chitlin's.... I'm telling y'all, though, if I was white for a couple of minutes, I'd be missing some chitlin's and hamhocks already. What about honey buns and grape and coke?

Then they switch to a clip of Sosa done up like the infamous joker, red lips in tow. Barkley ends with: Sammy Sosa, you know I got love for you, man, Stop it! Stop It, Sammy Sosa! Are you kidding me?

Saturday, November 14, 2009

All-American Porn: 25 Years of Vivid Entertainment Cover Art

World of Wonder Gallery presents "All-American Porn: 25 Years of Erotic Photography from Vivid Entertainment" to celebrate the 25th anniversary of Vivid's 1984 launch. Click here for a slideshow of the cover art collectibles that will be on display and read the interview with Vivid co-founder Steven Hirsch.


Friday, November 13, 2009

Military rules for the non-military personnel


The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the National Anthem … kick their ass.

When you witness firsthand someone burning the American Flag in protest… kick their ass.

Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these Veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these Veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a Disabled Veteran kicks their ass.

(GUYS) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDU’s), telling others that you used to be “Special Forces,” and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay if you were still seven. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.

Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, “Do you fly a jet?” Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass kicking (children are exempt).

If you witness someone calling the U.S. Coast Guard non military, inform them of their mistake…and kick their ass.

Roseanne Barr’s singing of the National Anthem is not a blooper…it was a disgrace and disrespectful. Laugh, and sooner or later your ass will be kicked.

Next time Old Glory (U.S. flag) prances by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her…of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass kicking.

What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam War makes her the enemy. The proper word to describe her is “traitor.” Just mention her nomination for “Woman of the Year” and get your ass kicked.

Don’t try to discuss politics with a military member or a veteran. We are Americans and we all bleed the same regardless of our party affiliation. Our Chain of Command, is to include our commander in Chief. The President (for those who didn’t know) is our CIC regardless of political party. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings where all those representatives” meet. All we know is that when those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to go straighten it out. The military member might direct you to Oliver North. (I can see him kicking your ass already.)

“Your mama wears combat boots” never made sense to me … stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and probably kick your ass!

Bin Laden and the Taliban are not communists, so stop saying “Let’s go kill those Commie’s!!!” And stop asking us where he is!!!! Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me … if you see anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers; let me know, so I can go kick their ass.

Flyboy (Air Force), Jar Head (Marines), Grunt (Army), Squid (Navy) etc, are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. Could get your ass kicked.

Last but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends please remember that there are, literally, thousands of sailors and troops far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get its ass kicked.

We are douchebags.......

Poster of the day

Jared Allen on the Mullet lifestyle


Jared Allen of the Minnesota Vikings discusses his signature mullet and the accompanying lifestyle it demands. Only the truly great Bros can pull it off without garnering too much ridicule. Jared Allen is just such a man.

Leave the "Risky Business" to Tom Cruise.



HOT CHICKS....IN A RISKY BUSINESS FAIL!!

Jones' Cheap Ass Prepaid Legal and Daycare Academy

Another One Under the Bus.....it's the hopey changy way.

White House Counsel Gregory Craig, who has tried to lead the closure of the Guantanamo Bay military prison, intends to resign on Friday according to the Washington Post.

That won't stop President Nepotism from his Chicago Politics business model though....he hires Anita Dunn's husband Bob Bauer, to replace Craig as general counsel.

Rearranging the deck chairs on the short bus.........

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month


Fort Hood Memorial Service

Isaiah 6: 'And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?' Then I said, 'Here am I! Send me.'' That is what our fine men and women in the military say everyday -- those who serve -- those who lay down their lives for others."

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Carrie Prejean sex tape video

If a hot chick like that can't go Surfing at Finger Beach, and put it on tape for her boyfriend's benefit, then the terrorists have already won.

Carrie Prejean wasn't the only member of her family who got a peek at Carrie's solo sex tape...... her MOM was in the room when the Miss California USA lawyers pressed play. Turns out her mom, Francine Coppola, is a closet carpet licker anyway.....so how shocking could this be?

Sources say Carrie's mom was in shock -- instantly turning sheet white as she watched her daughter give herself a hand and it took all of 15 seconds for Carrie to drop her $1 million demand from the Pageant people after the XXX tape was played.

Speaking of guys who spend their day Assaulting on a Friendly Weapon.....here is a video of her on Hannity.




More Carrie Prejean
Prejean -- Family Doesn't Always Come First
Carrie Prejean -- The Change of Heart
Prejean Sex Tape Triggers Settlement

Brazil student, Geysi Villa Nova Arruda expelled after row over short dress

I'm having trouble getting this one straight. Have the Taliban infiltrated this country? Here we are talking about Brazil.... notorious for hot bikini babes and supermodels, Carnival! (show me your tits), and this young skank gets expelled from her university for wearing this dress? What the hell is wrong with the men in this country.

The above video is in Portuguese from some Oprah type show, so it's better you turn the sound off anyway....that whining sounds the same in any language.

Recently, a 20-year-old female student named Geysi Villa Nova Arruda sparked a full-fledged riot after wearing a revealing pink dress to class.

The school, Bandeirante University, which expelled Arruda yesterday, is claiming that the dress sparked protests of student; other reports, however, claim that male students were simply going crazy for a pair of legs. Lencioni and the university said Arruda even raised her dress and stopped to pose for photos the night she was insulted. He said she also chose the longest way to get to class to attract the attention of more students. (she's a marketing student)

Some, apparently, tried to take photographs up her skirt when she went to the bathroom. Others, meanwhile, chanted puta – whore – as she was escorted out of the school by military police. PUTA, PUTA, PUTA. Another video showed a mob stomping and kicking her car, and blocking her when she tried to escape on foot.

Actually the only crime here....is the chick is a bit fugly.

Sunday, November 08, 2009

The new Guinness ad 'Bring It To Life'

OBAMAWEATHER

Captain Bullshit jumped the shark a while ago...What's coming out now is pure sharkshit.
Check out What is the weather and what to wear in Seattle? and plug in your own city. Obama.... for such a real Nowhere Man he's everywhere.

As long as this guy is in office....the weather report will always be cold and grey.

A disturbing trend

The photo above captures a disturbing trend that is beginning to affect wildlife in the US.

Animals that were formerly self-sufficient are now showing signs of belonging to the Democratic Party… as they have apparently learned to just sit and wait for the government to step in and provide for their care and sustenance.

Ricky Gervais on Fat People

Saturday, November 07, 2009

Don't copy Europes mistakes



This video on health care, produced by the Center for Freedom and Prosperity, features Eline van den Broek, founder of the European Independent Institute.

She does a nice job of explaining, in simple terms, why the United States should not copy Europe's mistakes, and why the key to true health care reform is less government, not more.

If government-run healthcare is approved, it is very likely that politicians will then look for a new revenue source to finance all the new spending that inevitably will follow. Unfortunately, that means a value-added tax (VAT) will be high on the list.

Indeed, the VAT recently has been favorably mentioned by powerful political figures and key Obama allies such as the Co-Chairman of his transition team and the Speaker of the House.
The VAT would be great news for the political insiders and beltway elite. A brand new source of revenue would mean more money for them to spend and a new set of loopholes to swap for campaign cash and lobbying fees.

But in this video.... the evidence from Europe unambiguously suggests that a VAT will dramatically increase the burden of government. That’s good for Washington, but bad for America.



Hope and change for the day

Can someone please explain this to me?



Baseball in Korea....batter gets hit, and charges the mound. Then batshit crazy breaks out.

Hey everybody.....I won!!!!

EU Directive Madness


Compare and Contrast:

Pythagoras - His theorem used 24 words

The Lords Prayer 66 words

Archimedes Principle 67 words

The Ten Commandments 179 words

The above were all world-changing events.

But our new EU Directive for the sale of cabbages, comes to, twenty six thousand, two hundred and fifty three words. 26,253!

The "Real" Michelle Obama

Cheerleader of the week!

I've seen chicks with six packs like this......but never outside a strip club.
GO PONIES!

Katarina Witt, socialism's most beautiful face

Katarina Witt was the GDR's poster athlete, everybody's darling in both East and West Germany.

All this was held against her once the Berlin Wall came down. The woman once dubbed "the most beautiful face of socialism" by Time Magazine soon found herself lampooned by German tabloids as a Party puppet.

In subsequent years, she also tried, in vain, to prevent publication of her Stasi file, which revealed that she had cooperated fully with East Germany's feared secret police.
STORY IN DEUTSCHE WELLE



She might be getting old, but Katarina Witt and her boob salad can still command an audience. Especially when she decides to wear one of those St. Pauli Girl type outfits. Watch here as she breaks out the gun show.

What life at the Cold War frontier in divided Germany was really like



What life at the Cold War frontier in divided Germany was really like. Part two in a series of three videos commemorating the 20th anniversary of the collapse of the Berlin wall.

Friday, November 06, 2009

I think she makes the all Madden team, it's just a different football

OK......Admit you at least shed a tear watching this

The saddest handjob in America

Obama recliners, for the line at the unemployment offices

George Patton speech on Iraq and the modern world


It's definitely worth watching the whole thing, but if you want to get right to the message....push it up to the six minute mark.

PATTON'S ORIGINAL SPEECH TO THE THIRD ARMY
(To get your Friday going...and because you just can't watch this enough times)



That's damn near my backyard they're fightin in!

Uncensored! George W. curses Ahmadinejad in UN Speech.



So George...what do you think about this douchebag who replaced you?

Thursday, November 05, 2009

NORTHWEST AIRLINES....WE FLY FURTHER


TIME MACHINE


President Obama and Gordon Brown are shown a time machine which can see 100
years into the future.

They both decide to test it by asking a question each.

President Obama goes first:
"What will the USA be like in 100 years time?"

The machine whirrs and beeps and goes into action and gives him a printout, he reads it out:

"The country is in good hands under the new president, crime is non-existent, there is no conflict, the economy is healthy. There are no worries"

Gordon Brown thinks "It's not bad this time machine, I'll have a bit of that" so he asks:

"What will Britain be like in 100 years time?"

The machine whirrs and beeps and goes into action, and he gets a printout.

But he just stares at it.

"Come on Gordon" says Obama, "Tell us what it says"

"I can't! It's all in Arabic!"

Never mind.....they're Canadian


They should have at least checked them to see if they were carrying any feet. If you haven't heard about this... check it out.

CIRCLE FLIES


A cowboy from Texas attends a social function where Barack Obama is trying to gather more support for his Health Plan. Once he discovers the cowboy is from President Bush’s home area, he starts to belittle him by talking in a southern drawl and single syllable words.

As he was doing that, he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head. The cowboy says, "Y'all havin' some problem with them circle flies?"

Obama stopped talking and said, "Well, yes, if that's what they're called, but I've never heard of circle flies."

"Well Sir," the cowboy replies, "circle flies hang around ranches. They're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse."

"Oh," Obama replies as he goes back to rambling. But, a moment later he stops and bluntly asks, "Are you calling me a horse's ass?"

"No, Sir," the cowboy replies, "I have too much respect for the citizens of this country to call their President a horse's ass."

"That's a good thing," Obama responds and begins rambling on once more.

After a long pause, the cowboy, in his best Texas drawl says, "Hard to fool them flies, though

From Phil's Dad...in 'Real America'

AMERICA ........FUCK YEAH!

Sunday, November 01, 2009

Christopher Walken does Lady Gaga's 'POKER FACE'



Friday night with Jonathon Ross on BBC1. Walken does a reading.

Layla Kiffen to pose for Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue?

For a short time, it was believed that Tennessee First Lady Layla Kiffin would be posing for the next Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Evidently reported by the Sports Animal radio station in Knoxville, after these pictures surfaced of her tailgating befor the UCLA game. ahhhhh not true.

In the minutes after he was hired at Tennessee, Lane Kiffin's wife, Layla, shot to the forefront of Google search results.....not to mention the thousands of people who joined the Facebook group, Our Coach's Wife Is Hotter Than Your Coach's Wife. There is finally a Tennessee fan that can not wear a bra and pull it off.